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Be Selfish About Self-Care

Written by: Saeeda Ruffin

Just about everything that we do, in lifeis for the benefit of others. From doing your daily grind on your job to being there for the people you love, chances are, your days are full of things to do.But, what are you doing for yourself, Sis? That’s the question that you need to ask yourself.

Making time for yourself and your self-care is important, and you should do your best to prioritize those things. Truth be told, with all that most women have to deal with in life, it may feel a bit “selfish” to really focus your attention on your own needs. You may feel this way because women are generally taught to attend to the needs of everybody but themselves. Well, Sis, no longer is that an acceptable way to live. Not for any of our beautiful Black sistas, and that includes you!

That’s right, Sis! It’s a new day and your self-care is the top priority. If focusing on your self-care is perceived as selfish, then, be selfish! It may not sound “nice”, but it’s not “nice” for you to neglect your mind, body, and spirit either. That has got to stop before you really start to suffer from all of that neglect, and Sis, you do not want that.

Here are a few strategies that you could use to help you to get started on this new journey towards a more self-centric mindset:

Choose Your Life

You choose what you do. When you always allow others to dictate what you do and where you should be, you could start to feel like you’re not in control of your life. That’s not healthy. Take back the reins and manage your time as you see fit. Your time is yours.

Me Time

Make time for you. No cap here, Sis. You should have times in your day that are specifically for your self-care. It can be as simple as spending quiet moments in a place that brings you solace, or as elaborate as a candlelit bubble bath. Whatever gives you that peace that you need to unpack the day, make THAT what you do.


Set clear boundaries. There is more to self-care than just doing things for your pleasure. Sometimes, you prioritize self-care by NOT doing things. This is especially true when you are called on to do things that will infringe on your personal time that you set aside for your own health and wellness. In time, you may need to make that time non-negotiable, and let the people in your life know that.

When you finally get your self-care on lock, your whole world could change for the better. People will learn to respect your time and boundaries. You will learn to love yourself even more. The balance and peace that comes with being selfish about your self-care will help you to live each day with a more healthy and holistic mindset...on your own terms. It’s your life, periodt.

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